


Cub, what series of events lead us to this exact moment?

by Pwyllxiety



Category: Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz
Genre: ;-;, Alters, Animal Crossing References, Canon-Typical Violence, Discord - Freeform, Dissociative Identity Disorder, I didn't mean to I swear, I finally decided to upload, I just write a lot of gay stuff, I made Alex bisexual, I went off the rails on this one, I'm thinking about new horizons, K-Unit - Freeform, References to Depression, Tom's gay btw, Vomiting, a mess, briefly mentioned, how to tag, not really in depth, oh no, please I didn't want smut tags, switch - Freeform, this has been in my files for 2 years, when I tagged switch I meant the console, whoopsies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:08:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23280730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pwyllxiety/pseuds/Pwyllxiety
Summary: “So, you’re the asset the director told us about?”“Oh, she called me an asset, did she? That’s new.”“Cub, what series of events lead us to this exact moment?”“Well that depends how much Tulip told you.”
Comments: 14
Kudos: 115





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, this has been my dearest child since 12/12/2018 and that is well, stressful. This is only one part of the story, as it was like 2000 words long and I can't deal anymore, I'm uploading this and continuing the next bits.

Alex was sat by himself at the back of the classroom, cliché right? It had been like that since Tom left. His parents had got divorced and his father moved away- taking Tom with him.

The teacher was talking about the upcoming parents evening. The _mandatory_ parents evening mind you- one that Alex couldn’t talk himself out of. Alex didn’t know what to do, he had to attend, not only him but an adult- parents or guardians.

He decided that it was a good time to call the bank, because despite how much he wanted Tulip Jones dead he really needed help.

He shoved his hand up, and the teacher looked at him clearly displeased.

“Bathroom?” He asked hopefully.

The teacher grumbled and nodded.

He walked calmly toward the door, but once he was on the other side, he sprinted to the boy’s bathroom.

The dreaded boy’s bathroom- smelly urinals and graffitied walls. Alex fought back the urge to gag and pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts until he found the bank.

“This is the royal and general bank, London. How can I help you today?” A chirpy voice said on the other end.

“Could you put me through to Tulip Jones please?” Alex sighed.

A brief sound of typing was all Alex could hear.

“There’s nobody here under that name.” The woman replied.

“Oh right, this is Alexander Rider- code: Charlie, Sierra, Zero, Zero, One.” Alex methodically stated.

“I’ll put you through to Mrs. Jones.” The phone line cut off momentarily.

“Alex, what can I do for you.” Tulip said- no emotion, not a single inflection in her voice.

“There’s a mandatory parents evening on Thursday.” Alex sighed.

“And this concerns me why?” Mrs Jones said robotically.

“You do know what mandatory means right?” Alex complained.

“I do.” She replied.

“In case you forgot, the bank is my legal _fucking_ guardian, and I can’t take a bank for a discussion with my teacher.” Alex griped.

“Then who do you suggest you take.” She sighed.

“I don’t know, that’s why I called _you_.” Alex hissed.

“Fine, but don’t complain that I didn’t give you a choice. Because I did. I’ll send them after school, I expect you to fill them in, and let them stay in your house until Thursday.” Mrs Jones explained.

“They don’t have to stay at my house for-” Alex began.

The dial tone rung in his ear.

“-three days.” Alex finished, to nobody except the bathroom wall.

The rest of school went by, and he rode home on his bike. Thinking about who the person was going to be.

He unlocked the door to his house once he got there, ignoring the prying eyes from neighbours, trying to catch a glimpse of the enigmatic resident.

He changed into normal clothing; an oversized, almost pastel-grey hoodie and black jeans, and dropped on to his couch. Anxiously awaiting his guest.

The doorbell rung at four pm sharp.

* * *

Mrs Jones had just hung up; the parents evening was an annoyance and she was going to have to pull some strings.

An hour later, at one pm- four men were gathered in Mrs Jones’ office.

“A very valuable- asset of ours needs a favour.” She explained. Choosing her words carefully.

“He needs a group of people to act as a family and take him to parents evening.” She explained.

“Parents evening?” Wolf echoed.

“Ma’am isn’t that something for secondary school students?” Eagle asked.

Mrs Jones nodded.

“The bank is his legal guardian. And the meeting I’m told is mandatory. This is his address; you will stay there for a few days before the actual parents evening.” Mrs Jones explained. Handing Wolf a piece of paper.

“Be there at four.” She said, before shooing the men from her room

* * *

Alex opened the door cautiously- his converse clad feet shuffling backwards so the door could open fully. He didn’t even bother looking up as he sighed.

“I’m guessing Tulip sent you, I’m Alexander Rider. Tulip informed me you’re staying in my house for a few days. I have four spare rooms so take your pick. My room is directly opposite the top of the stairs and my office is directly to the right. The other two doors on that floor are a bathroom and one spare bedroom, and up the next flight of stairs there’s another three bedrooms.” He explained gesturing for them to come into the house only looking up to do so.

The four SAS men at the door looked to be in varying degrees of shock.

“Of course, Tulip picked you four, she wouldn’t have told me not to complain otherwise.” He said, rolling his eyes.

“Cub?” Eagle asked slowly.

“Didn’t your mothers ever tell you it was rude to stare? Now get in before my neighbours get nosey.” Alex stated. All four men snapped out of their stupor and entered the house. Alex shut the door carefully.

* * *

“So, you’re the asset the director told us about?” Snake asked.

“Oh, she called me an asset, did she? That’s new.” Alex replied, slumping down onto the couch.

“Cub, what series of events lead us to this exact moment?” Eagle asked.

“Well that depends how much Tulip told you.” Alex replied flippantly.

“Uhm, she told us that the bank was your guardian. And something about parents evening.” Wolf said. Still completely confused.

“Okay right, so then it’s time for me to fill in the gaps, that’s always fun. My name is Alex Rider, or agent Rider, or Cub-” Alex began.

Fox opened his mouth to ask a question.

“Wait until the end of my spiel to ask questions, Daniels. You met me at BB when I was fourteen years old. You all treated me like dirt because you thought my parental figure paid for me to be there. When in reality, six forced me to be there because I was training for my first mission. That never would’ve happened if my uncle, Ian Rider hadn’t died on duty.” Alex paused for breath.

“And as for this specific moment in time, I can’t exactly take a bank to parents evening and so I complained in Tulip’s general direction- I just didn’t expect all of you.” Alex said.

“Who’s been looking after you?” Fox asked slowly.

“Until recently, my uncle’s house keeper. But she was-” Alex paused- he didn’t really want to tell anyone about Jack’s death.

“-Bored of me and moved back to America.” He finished, a complete lie but it was better than the truth.

“That’s real shitty.” Eagle sighed.

Alex didn’t like him saying that Jack was shitty. But this was made up Jack, so he guessed it was fine.

“Parents evening is on Thursday, feel free to make yourself at home.” Alex said, kicking off his shoes and leaving them on the bottom step.

Ben looked down at his now only socked feet, one sock boldly declared it was Friday, which it clearly wasn’t. And the other was an emerald green with a few silver stripes, if Ben had to guess he’d assume it was a Slytherin sock.

Alex lightly padded up the stairs, leaving the others standing in the foyer- watching him push open what he had proclaimed earlier as the office door and disappear inside, without so much of a clunk of a door handle.

The four SAS men looked at each other, not really knowing how to react- until Fox suggested that they remove their boots and go sit in the living room. They left their pristine army boots in the hallway and stepped into the living room, which had an attached kitchenette with a large island counter acting as a divider.


	2. Chapter 2

Alex crept downstairs a few hours later for some coffee, none of them had heard him until he’d already been leaning against the counter with a coffee mug in hand.

“I need to know your names.” Alex said, probably louder than he needed to be. The soldiers turned towards him, clearly startled. He grinned, before taking another sip of his coffee.

“If one- or all four of you are going to come to school with me on Thursday evening, I’ll need to know your names.” Alex explained.

Wolf nodded.

“James San Lucas.” He stated.

“Ewan Taylor.” Snake said with a smile.

“Connor O’Sullivan.” Eagle said, waving as he did so, for some reason.

“Ben Daniels.” Fox smirked.

“Though you already knew that.” He continued.

Alex began piecing his old unit together now.

He already knew that Snake- Ewan, was Scottish, the accent was hard to miss.

James was maybe of Hispanic descent, but that was going off surname alone.

Connor seemed to have a stereotypical Irish surname, which now Alex thought about it, he had a very mild Irish accent, which he never really caught onto.

And Ben, was just Ben. With the typical, middle-class English upbringing, there was nothing to really think about.

“Right- uhm, do any of you have the time?” Alex continued, realising he’d left his phone on the desk after patting down is jean pockets.

“Ten to Seven.” Wolf helpfully supplied.

“Okay, so I definitely do not have enough food for five people in here.” He mumbled, partially to himself with his head hidden behind the now open fridge door.

He shut the fridge door softly and reached up to a book on the top shelf of the unit above the fridge. He tossed the book at the kitchen table, where it landed with a heavy thud. A cloud of dust rose from it, visible in the fluorescent glow of the lights.

“Do any of you have any money?” Alex asked, though judging by the sheepish looks on his old unit’s faces the answer was no. Alex rolled his eyes, whilst snatching two twenty-pound notes from his jean pocket and slapping them down next to the book.

“Just order something from in here, it’s all the local takeaways so take your pick.” He continued before turning back to the pantry and grabbing a box of trail mix and reaching into the next cupboard along and getting a small plastic bowl.

He filled the bowl quickly and grabbed his coffee from the side. He turned back to the pantry and placed the trail mix box back inside.

“Don’t bother saving any for me.” He said looking back towards K-Unit and then towards the book. Before turning on his heel, coffee and trail mix in hand and walking back towards the stairs.

They watched him go and then looked back to each other.

“That was a rather weird interaction.” Snake noted.

“Did you guys see how he moved? Super freaky- almost like he’s floating.” Eagle agreed.

Wolf opened the fridge- “When he said there definitely wasn’t enough food for all of us, he was kidding- in fact, the only thing in here is expired milk.” He complained.

“What the hell does he eat? Other than trail mix.” Fox added, opening the pantry door.

“Well, other than crackers- that have gone soft mind you, trail mix is the only thing in here.” He continued.

“Six-hundred-and-ninety-three calories per 150 grams? How is he still alive for fucks sake?” He finished.

“We don’t know how much of it he eats in a day, he could be perfectly healthy.” Snake chipped in. Before turning toward Wolf, who was currently rifling through the other cabinets.

“Mugs and cups, Bowls and plates, jugs, bigger bowls and other baking stuff.” He listed off after checking each cupboard.

“So, nothing interesting then?” Eagle concluded, reaching for the landline and looking over the list of takeaways. It took about a ten minute argument before they settled on the Chinese round the corner that did deliveries.

Wolf had moved onto the drawers- looking down into the only one he hadn’t looked in, as the others just contained things like dishcloths and wooden spoons he hadn’t bothered mentioning them.

“Cutlery, and a-” He hesitated.

“Fucking hand gun, what the fuck?” He finished, hesitantly picking it up to make sure the safety was on.

“Yeah I probably should’ve warned you about that.” Alex said with no genuine apology in his voice- empty coffee cup dangling from his hand.

“Have you guys even ordered food, or have you been snooping through my kitchen for half hour?” He continued, a subtle smirk gracing his face.

Wolf spun round to face him, panic in his eyes for a second.

“You need to st-” he sputtered.

“Stop doing that? Yeah I get that a lot.” Alex complained.

“Jeez, you tell a spy to not do something which was ingrained into them at like age five- what are you, a monster?” He continued, swinging his coffee cup around by the handle careless.

He’d taken off his hoodie when he was upstairs, revealing a rumpled Chelsea Football shirt underneath, Snake looked him up and down, his slightly too thin torso seemed to be of great scrutiny.

“What have you eaten today?” Snake said, though it came off gruffer than intended. Alex busied himself with futzing with the coffee machine and completely ignoring the men in his kitchen.

“Cub-” Snake began.

“Shut up.” Alex hissed, grabbing his once again full mug and retreating back upstairs, as if he was a wounded animal. K unit looked at each other, worry in their eyes.

“That’s not a reaction someone who eats enough would have, right?” Eagle said with a frown.

Fox shook his head, “We still don’t have enough info, we should stop jumping to conclusions.”

“Maybe we should call the director? If anyone knows how he’s doing, it’s got to be her right?” Wolf suggested, sounding a whole lot more concerned than usual.

Wolf reaches down into his pocket and takes out a slightly dingy, cracked iPhone 4 from within. He taps in the passcode, more forcefully than was probably needed.

He’s got the bank on speed dial and is already talking before anyone answers- the moment he hears the connection he gives his code and asks for Mrs Jones who picks up right away.

“Mr Lucas, to whom do I owe the pleasure.” Mrs Jones says curtly.

“Ma’am, do you know how Rider is?” Fox says, floundering for words.

“What would you mean by that?” She responds, disinterest obvious in her voice.

“Mentally- how is his mental health?” Snake asks gingerly.

Mrs Jones audibly snorts, and Wolf decides he really doesn’t like her.

“He’s a state- won’t eat, hardly sleeps, doesn’t talk to anyone either.” She states flatly.

“Hardly sleeps?” Eagle repeats.

“Not since Cairo.” She responds again and hangs up.

* * *

“Cairo? What happened in Cairo?” Wolf says to the air, even after hearing the dial tone.

The four of them stare at each other blankly before Fox pipes up.

“I shouldn’t say, because it was just a rumour I heard from the halls of ‘6. But supposedly a young agent’s girlfriend slash housekeeper, that info changed from telling to telling, was killed by a splinter sell of SCORPIA in Egypt, after the agent had destroyed the main cell.” He explains, his hands moving animatedly.

“Didn’t Cub say his housekeeper- uhm- moved away?” Eagle responds with a sinking feeling settling in his stomach.

“That doesn’t mean it was him.” Wolf interjects.

“You’re kidding yourself, that story lines up perfectly with what we know about Cub.” Snake responded- done with beating around the bush.

Wolf didn’t want to believe it, Cub was young, sixteen at most- Wolf didn’t want to believe that Cub, no, Alex had gone through such loss- was it just his housekeeper and his uncle, or were his parents also dead?

It seemed that was the case, as a series of photos on the mantlepiece showed.

A man, a woman and a baby; The man from the first image and another man who looked similar; A different, red-haired woman and a toddler; The second man from photo two and a preteen; and finally, a teen and the red-haired woman from before.

The toddler, preteen and teenager were all clearly Alex- and so Wolf assumed he was also the baby.

He assumed the first man and woman were his mum and dad, the second man was his uncle, and by elimination the red-haired lady must’ve been his housekeeper. It was strange to look at- it was almost like there should’ve been a sixth photo of Alex now, alone- but there would be no reason.

Fox was looking at a different photo, his face white as a sheet- Alex and a man who was too familiar. He removes it from the frame, in the hopes that someone had carefully written something on the back- he was right.

Alex and his Godfather, Anthony Sean Howell.

That was Ash, he’d killed Alex’s godfather, for killing two agents thirteen years ago- two agents, a man and a woman. John and Helen- John and Helen Rider.

Alex’s godfather had killed his parents.

He recoiled in horror and dropped the photo frame, the glass cracking into several pieces. Snake looked over to him, and then down to the shattered glass.

“Are you good?” He asks slowly.

“Helen and John Rider-” Fox begins.

“-Ash killed them; Ash was Alex’s godfather.” He continues.

“His godfather killed his parents, and I-” He cuts off with a sigh.

“And I killed Ash.” Fox ends. His voice wavering.

“We need to talk to Alex. It can’t wait any longer.” Eagle states, solemnly.

A noise from the top of the stairs distracts them.


	3. Chapter 3

The noise in question is light footsteps hurriedly moving from one room to the next. And wolf bolts up the stairs after the sound.

There’s one door open and Wolf walks toward the open door, expecting the worst. Had someone broken in? He thinks, pushing the door to its fully open position. It’s not what he’s expecting.

Alex kneeled on the bathroom floor, head over the toilet. He looked pale, and scared, and he was being sick.

Another wave of vomiting comes over him and his knuckles go white from where he’s gripping the toilet bowl. He stops, and pitches sideways and before Wolf can get to him, his head hits the side of the bathtub.

“Shit.” Wolf mutters breathlessly moving towards Alex, he rolls him over gently.

He lifts him, unsettled by how light Alex feels. Wolf walks back across the hallway to the room Alex had previously referred to as his own, he pushes the door open with his shoulder and moves over to the neatly made bed and lays Alex down.

Wolf goes back towards the door and calls down the stairs- explaining what he’d witnessed once his unit had joined him in Alex’s room.

“He didn’t look like he was doing it on purpose.” Wolf had said, knowing that with the lack of food in the house, it was easy to assume it was purging.

Snake shook his head-

“The way the director explained it, he’s not starving himself- he’s just unable to keep any food down, it sounds like illness caused by PTSD induced nightmares.” He explains, as the medic it seemed he would have the most rational outlook on what was happening.

Alex shifts in his unconsciousness and begins whispering quietly, feverish babbling in which several names are mentioned. Some familiar some less so.

‘Jack, Ian, Yassen, Ash.’ Not one single mention of his parents, which Eagle thought was strange- even stranger was the name Yassen- a Russian name which seemed of high relevance and yet none of them knew who the name belonged to.

The feverish babbling sounds too structured to be nothing, to mean nothing- so Eagle listens closer.

“He’s speaking Russian.” Eagle notes, much to the surprise of his other unit members, who all start listening as well. None of them speak Russian, but none of them knew cub spoke Russian either, or maybe he doesn’t consciously.

The whispering stops after about twenty minutes and the room settles back into relative silence until Alex bolts up right and punches Fox, who had been stood closest in the abdomen.

Fox doubles over in pain, not expecting such a punch to come. Alex opens his eyes and begins apologising profusely, or it sounds like it, he’s switching from language to language; Russian, French, Japanese, German, Gaelic and then in English.

Snake begins instructing Alex to breathe deeply and calm down, and he tries his best to follow the rhythm Snake is laying out for him to breath to.

Once calmed down he begins again in English, once again apologising to Fox.

“Alex, how do you know Russian?” Fox asks slowly, stretching back up to full height.

Alex blinks, and doesn’t respond, there’s hardly any life in his eyes and the cheeky teenager that was on display earlier seemed to be long gone, leaving a hollow shell behind.

Though now Eagle thinks about it, this room is rather dull compared to any normal teenage boys- there’s no posters, no books, there’s not a phone or laptop on the nightstand- and to top it off, there’s a thin layer of dust which seems to coat everything.

It’s about five minutes of painful silence later when Alex stands up and disappears into the next room, which Snake recalls as the office.

* * *

Eagle is halfway down the stairs when the doorbell rings, and he runs the rest of the way, he’d totally forgotten about the food and pays the shrewish man at the door quickly, before grabbing the food. He follows Fox into the living room and places the bag of Chinese food on the counter.

“What the hell just happened?” Wolf announces upon entering the living room.

“The Chinese food?” Eagle responds.

“No! What happened upstairs?” Wolf amends.

“You were there, James.” Eagle states.

“No- I mean.” Wolf sighs.

“You saw what he was like after he woke up, normal teenagers don’t do that- right?” He continues.

“Most teenagers aren’t spies with no family, Wolf.” Fox says quietly.

* * *

Alex sits alone in the office, mind still reeling- his hands clutching his phone like it’s a lifeline.

His phone vibrates once, and he looks down. It’s a snapchat from Tom- Tom’s, well he’s wonderful- Always knew when something was wrong, even from hundreds of miles away.

Tom asks how he is, it’s spelt badly- which Alex gives a watery smile. Tom would never make it through GCSE English.

Alex responds with a rundown of what’s happened since 9am- Parents evening, his old unit, the panic attack. It’s not good. He’s upset all over again by the end of the paragraph.

Tom snaps back after a few minutes, telling him that everything will turn out okay- sweet nothings that Alex clings to, no matter how untrue his brain says they are.

He says the world won’t fall apart- and there’s no need to hold the weight alone, even though K-unit weren’t the best, Tom begs him to talk to them about it. The trauma, the deaths- everything that’s happened since his fourteenth birthday.

Alex can’t bring himself too, but he can’t bring himself to lie to Tom either, so he tells the truth- he’s afraid, even though he knows in the line of work that they’re in, they’re all bound to have something to relate to in Alex. But he just can’t bring himself to have that conversation with them.

He’s afraid they’ll see him as weak. He’s afraid they already see him that way- or they’ll think he’s doing this to himself, or that they’ll think the three scars on his upper arm are self-inflicted.

Alex used to leave out all the gory bits of being an agent when he was talking to Tom, afraid the naïve teen’s world view would be shattered. But Tom had become Jaded, especially after his parent’s divorce. That’s when Alex had told Tom about everything else- the torture, the nightmares. Even though he was afraid that Tom would leave him after that, he never did. Supporting Alex through almost everything, even though he was in Aberdeen and Alex was in Chelsea.

Tom’s even sat on Discord with Alex all night, after Alex had a particularly rough night- and Alex returned the favour, supporting Tom when he came out- and letting him stay over when his parents were arguing.

The night after Jack’s funeral, Tom had insisted on staying round, just to make sure Alex was okay, and remained okay.

They’d spent the night watching movies and keeping each other warm. Though Tom had imposed strictly platonic boundaries in case Alex became uncomfortable, even though Alex didn’t care in the slightest.

It was after Tom moved away, Alex realised how much he loved Tom, though he would verbally argue that it was in a friendly way- he privately knew it wasn’t. He’d questioned himself after Tom came out as gay.

He’d kept arguing with himself for a long time after that, he was young James Bond, he was meant to be a ladies man when he hit his prime- But something about Tom made his heart flutter and he couldn’t figure out why, and sure Chris Evans was hot, but he was straight- he’d always been straight.

_But what about prince Eric?_

Chips in the little voice at the back of his head, shit he’d forgotten about that. Prince Eric from the little mermaid was such a heart throb.

Okay, so maybe he was bisexual.

It was that same feeling he’d had recently, playing breath of the wild, on the switch which was docked downstairs- Link was dreamy, and oh no- there he goes again.

So, even after everything that had happened today, another thing Alex didn’t know about himself decided to make itself known, and Alex couldn’t deal with anymore today, so he slammed his phone down a little too hard on the desk and plugged in the charger.

Looking down at the time displayed on screen, 23:30. He retreated to the back corner of the office and laid down on the sofa, throwing the nearest blanket over himself and reaching for the light switch.

Wolf and Fox came up about twenty minutes later to find the spare rooms, Fox slowly opened Alex’s bedroom door to see if the teen was in bed- but the room was empty, so he opened the office door and peaked his head round the door using the light from the hallway to look in, only to see Alex asleep on the sofa looking more comfortable than he did in his own bed- on top of that, the office looked far more lived in then the bedroom next door.

Fox shut the door and he and Wolf venture to the next staircase to find their rooms.


	4. Chapter 4

Fox had stayed up pretty late that night, staring at the unfamiliar bedroom ceiling- thinking about the teen asleep a floor below him, Mrs Jones had lied to Fox outright last time he’d spoken to her about Cub- She’d told him the snakehead thing had been a onetime job, and Fox had been naïve enough to believe it.

He’d damn MI6 to hell if he could, for ruining a life so young, but none of that was going to bring back Alex’s family- the espionage in the family ran deep- and Fox could tell if Alex was a little older he probably would’ve found his own way into the MI6. But Fox just wished that it hadn’t been when Alex was fourteen.

That was two years ago, Alex was sixteen now he assumed, which would put him in year eleven. He takes his phone from the nightstand, thumbs the fingerprint scanner, the phone vibrates signifying a match and opens up- Fox opens twitter and goes to compose a tweet-

‘When I signed up for this job, I didn’t expect to end up here.’

Fox’s twitter was completely anonymous, the name wasn’t his, there was no phone number linked, the email was a throw away. He’s sure if someone tried hard enough, they could find out it was his, but hopefully he never pissed off anyone enough for that to happen.

He leaves twitter after that looking down at the time, his phone tells him it’s 3:43 and he puts it back down on the side table. He turns over and tries to get some sleep.

* * *

Alex wakes up at 7am the next morning, when his phone spits out it’s cheery alarm tone- he rolls off of the sofa and hits the floor with a soft thud, he doesn’t smell the best- and he’s still wearing yesterday’s clothes- he reminds himself its Tuesday now, and K-unit only has to stay until Thursday, content with that her grabs his school uniform and heads to the bathroom, he quickly showers and brushes his teeth while doing so, props for efficiency right? He thinks. He steps out of the shower dries off and gets changed into his uniform- the teachers dislike that he wears jeans rather than uniform trousers, but hey- at least he’s actually been to school more than once this month.

When he gets downstairs Eagle is sat at the kitchen island, with cereal and milk which Alex thought was the expired milk from the fridge- but upon inspection of the date was fresh.

Which is to his surprise gone when he opens the refrigerator door- finding actual food in its place.

“What have you been shopping or something?” Alex questions lightly.

“Yup, you’d be surprised how many shops are open at 6am.” Eagle remarks.

Alex nods absent-minded, this is the first time the kitchens been stocked since she died- and there goes the grief again- _shit._

Alex turns on his heel and promptly leaves the kitchen, leaving Eagle alone and confused- and explaining just what had happened to Snake when he comes downstairs ten minutes later.

“Weird.” Snake agrees as he pours milk over the shredded wheat in his bowl.

Snake was wearing the same as yesterday, though Eagle had changed.

“I went home to grab some clothes when I was done shopping, and I suggest you do the same.” He explained, noticing Snake’s slightly rumpled white shirt-

“And I think if we go to parents evening on Thursday dressed in our standard uniform, we might get more questions than needed.” Eagle continues, it’s a good point and Snake makes a mental reminder to go home and change whilst Alex is at school.

Alex leaves the house at eight on the dot, and Snake leaves to go get changed and bring some spare clothes back to Alex’s and by the time he’s back Wolf and Fox have also gone to do the same thing.

Eagle was ‘inspecting’ the switch docked at the side of the telly, which if Snake understood Eagles methods meant searching through Cub’s Animal Crossing town and checking how many characters he’d unlocked in smash brothers. Really important research- you know, the usual.

Snake had decided listening to Eagle’s excited rambling about the untitled goose game was not the best thing to spend his time doing, so he turned to grab the book he’d bought with him and busied himself with reading, Fox returned with a phone charger and a duffle of clothes an hour later, and Wolf came soon after, with a rucksack of clothes and an old Gameboy which he insisted was the best hand held console to this day.

* * *

Period one in set two maths was dull, and Alex was getting antsy- school always set off the entire ‘someone’s watching’ instinct in Alex’s head, every person sat behind him was watching him, not Ms Gimm, the stout, old lady who taught them maths. And maybe his brain was right, I mean everyone wanted to get a peek at Rider, allusive as he was.

He spent the majority of the lesson scowling at his text book and scribbling memes in the corners of his exercise book; Ms Gimm keeps him behind after class and tells him he needs to do better- though he assures her he already knows the content of the 300 page text book cover to cover, which he definitely doesn’t.

She sends him off with a note for his next teacher, explaining the tardiness- which the next teacher, Mr Rales in science excepts with a sharp glare and tells Alex to sit down.

Biology, it had to be Biology, Alex _fucking_ hates biology, they’ve spent the last three lessons learning about palisade cells and Alex is ready to snap. He’s scrolling through twitter under the desk and Mr Rales walks right up to him.

“Rider, give me your phone for the rest of the lesson.” Mr Rales huffs.

Alex pockets his phone.

“And what are you going to do if I don’t, Richard.” Alex says back.

Richard was Mr Rales’ first name and he refuses to let students refer to him as such.

Alex gets sent out of the classroom after that, and when Mr Rales leaves the class to ask him to explain himself Alex was already long gone-

Alex pushes his bike under the school gate and swings his body over the top of it, dropping softly on the other side- he grabs his bike from the floor and realises he can’t go home, because K-unit will be there.

He removes his blazer and begins unbuttoning his shirt, he’s wearing a grey t-shirt underneath and he shoves the two articles of clothing into his school bag and takes off down the road.

He finds himself on the recreational ground near the town centre, laying on the cold grass, staring up at the sky with his headphones in- He’s listening to some song by fall out boy, one he can barely recall the name of but he likes none the less. It’s only eleven am and he’s not expected home until three pm, so he knows he’s there for the long haul- though there’s a news agent’s around the corner and he has enough money for a Monster, so there was that he supposed.

He gets up at around half twelve and bikes down to the shop to get the energy drink he craves and comes back to sit on the swing in the empty playground.

He waits until half two before getting back on his bike and heading for home, which he gets to dead on three and walks into, waving at Fox who was sat on the sofa, grabbing the switch from Eagle who was playing Smash and disappearing upstairs into the office.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is literally the longest chapter I've wrote, in ages, oh my god.

It certainly was an improvement from last night, Fox could tell that much- he just couldn’t tell what had improved or how for that matter. It was like Alex was acting completely different again, there’s a million different personalities running around in that kid’s head, Fox thinks. Because from what little he saw of the boy then he wasn’t even sure that was the sarcastic teen from Monday afternoon was there either.

Which means they’d seen three different people or, as Fox had recalled hearing people say before, Alters.

The office door isn’t fully shut and from downstairs, he can hear Alex talking to somebody, and he can also quieter responses from someone who sounds around Alex’s age, but the response is clearly coming from a speaker rather than an actual person upstairs.

Alex is complaining about maths and science, and the voice responds complaining about his day- telling him that Albyn sucks and he wishes that his dad hadn’t sent him to some lame private school.

“Albyn school?” Snake echoed.

“I think that’s what he said, yeah.” Fox replies.

“I used to go there.” Snake remarks.

“It’s in Aberdeen- so I wonder who Cub’s talking to.” Snake explains.

Fox shrugs in return and goes back to looking at his phone.

The door shuts not long after that.

* * *

“Hey Tom, how’d you figure out you were gay?” Alex asks, it sounds so awkward coming from him- but he doesn’t know how else to tell Tom what he’s figured out about himself.

“Well, I just realised I don’t like girls- I thought I’d told you this before anyway?” Tom responds.

They’re on video call- Tom was sat cross-legged on his bed, half looking at some English homework that was due three days ago, mostly paying attention to Alex. Alex, who was sat on his desk chair, in the most uncomfortable looking position ever, one leg hooked over the arm of the chair, the other folded over top with his back resting against the other arm.

“Well, it’s just that- I think I like guys, but I like girls too.” Alex explains, looking way to stressed out about the whole thing to even think.

Tom almost drops his English Lit book.

“Well- uh. You don’t need to label it if you don’t want to- but like, congratulations?” Tom sputters out- hardly believing what Alex had said.

Tom had, well for lack of a better word, the worlds biggest crush on Alex, since Alex saved him from those bullies all that time ago- but he knew Alex probably didn’t like him back like that, even if he had just come out to him.

Alex paused-

“So, you aren’t angry?” He whispered.

Tom shook his head.

“Of course not, you moron- why would I be angry?” He said with a smile.

“I don’t know, I just- my brain was being a bitch again.” Alex replies with a sigh, it’s a huge weight off his chest coming out to Tom, he was in Alex’s opinion the only person that needed to know.

“Well anyway, could you help me with this homework?” Tom changes the subject quickly, to the literature work.

“No idea, what’s it about?” Alex replies, thankful for Tom’s conversational retrieval skills.

“Uh, Pride and Prejudice? We were meant to read it and do a book report, but like, fuck words?” Tom explained, glaring at the lined paper.

Alex snorted, stifling a laugh behind his hand.

“Google is your friend.” He states, swishing his hands about for effect.

He takes out his phone and waves it at the webcam-

“Do you wanna play call of duty when your done?” Alex says with a grin.

“Abso-fucking-lutely.” Tom responds with a nod.

“Okay google, give me a plot synopsis of Pride and Prejudice.” Tom says loudly towards his phone, which responds with some boring explanation which Alex can’t help but yawn at.

“Dude, how do you survive that class? I’d die.” Alex says with a laugh.

“Believe me, I’m not surviving.” Tom complains, shaking his head at the work.

Alex once again laughs at his friends’ antics and Tom grins back-

“I’m still saving for that damn plane ticket, I’ll get there.” Tom says when the call lulls.

“Dude I wanna come visit you in Aberdeen too, your house is huge.” Alex agrees.

“I’ll beg six for some money, they won’t complain if it keeps me happy.” Alex continues.

Tom nods,

“I mean, they pose as a bank right, so they must have money somewhere.” He explains.

There’s a loud noise downstairs-

“Give me a minute Tom, if I’m not back in thirty- call the police.” Alex states calmly, exhaling through his nose.

He deafens his discord and opens the office door. He creeps down the stairs slowly and peaks over the banister. He can’t see any of K-unit so he descends the rest of the way cautiously and grabs a rapier from the umbrella stand- because hey, you can never be too careful. If he’s quiet, he can probably get to the gun in the kitchen too- but that’s where the noise is coming from, so he isn’t too confident.

Where is K-unit? Alex thinks, he’s only just heard the noise, so he doubts all of them could’ve been taken down that quickly. Brandishing the sword, he rounds the corner to living room and keeps a low centre as he inches towards the kitchen, he paces his breathing so if anyone was there, they wouldn’t hear him and ducks behind the island counter-

“Rider. I know you’re here somewhere.” Comes an unfamiliar voice from the kitchen.

Where the _fuck_ is K-unit? Alex thinks desperately. His hands are shaky enough that he can see the sword wobbling, but there’s not a lot he can do about that now, the sound of a gun being cocked brings him back to attention.

The sound of the front door has him panicking- backup perhaps. He barely sees Eagles ginger hair before desperately yelling for him to get down and cover.

There’s already a bullet whizzing towards the door and it hits the frame in a spray of splinters.

Eagle throws himself behind the sofa and the door shuts, Alex doesn’t know if the rest of K-unit is still outside, or somewhere else entirely- he looks desperately at Eagle’s location behind the sofa as the gunman steps forward and looks round the counter where Alex was.

“What the hell do you want?” Alex says holding the sword towards the man, knowing it was useless against the gun.

The gunman smiles-

“There is many, many people who want you dead Rider- too many to count, so much so that in the underworld there is a considerable bounty on you, funded by the worlds most powerful crime lords.” He explains, and Alex is biding his time until he can strike.

It’s only been ten minutes since he came down, or there about- he really wishes he’d told Tom to give him less time, he really needed the police right about now.

“So, are you going to kill me?” Alex breaths out.

“No, there’s another thing they want- they want you tortured before their eyes-” The gunman says,

“They want to see you alive before they see you dead. I will take great pride in delivering you to them.” He continues.

Alex is panicking now, he can’t keep this guy talking for another twenty minutes, and Eagle is stuck behind the sofa- there’s nothing to stop this guy from taking Alex right now- he’s still holding the sword and he’s not looking at the gun, if he’s needed alive, this guy can’t afford to kill him, which gives him more leverage to get out. He jabs the sword forward, straight into the stomach of the gunman, who cries out in pain.

Alex grabs and twists the hand holding the gun, and takes it once the man lets go, he aims it at the intruder his hands still shaking.

“Go now, and I won’t shoot, if you don’t, well I’m sure you didn’t come here with blanks, did you?” Alex states levelly, fifteen minutes left to neutralise the threat.

The man snarls at him, still clutching his sluggishly bleeding stomach- and Alex raises the gun towards his head-

“I don’t want to have to explain this noise to the neighbours, but there’s several ways to shut them up.” Alex complains, waving the gun loosely- He can hear Eagle laugh from behind the sofa.

“Not a good time, Connor.” Alex remarks quietly- with a sigh.

“Now I repeat- Leave now, or leave later in a body bag, your choice.” Alex continues- his hands getting shakier the more imposing the threat becomes.

There’s only ten minutes until Tom calls the police.

The man still isn’t leaving, and Alex fires a ‘warning’ shot through the man’s wrist, he cries out in pain.

“I told you to leave- I wasn’t kidding, LEAVE.” Alex states again. The man gets up, frightened, and escapes through the back door. Alex drops the gun and bolts back upstairs, and Eagle follows him-

* * *

Alex unmutes discord-

“It’s fine Tom, nothing bad.” Alex sighs into the microphone.

“Alex, you were gone for twenty-three minutes, it normally doesn’t take that long before you realise you’re alone- or were you not actually alone this time?” Tom asks.

Eagle listens from the door.

“One active shooter, that was all.” Alex explains.

“That was all- Alex a man with a gun was in your house!” Tom exclaims.

“It’s fine, he’s gone now- left after I shot once.” Alex replies.

“You- shot him, Alex, I- that’s not good for any of you.” Tom says, not upset just concerned.

“They’ll be fine in a little while, though AJ won’t settle.” Alex complains.

“Of course AJ won’t settle, not after that.” Tom responds, and Alex looks towards the door.

“Connor, are you good?” He says to Eagle.

“Connor?” Tom echoes, confused.

“Oh, right- you remember me mentioning Eagle, right?” Alex explains.

“Yeah, I remember.” Tom confirms.

“Wait, who’s AJ, and who are you talking to?” Eagle asks from the doorway.

“I’m talking to Tom, we were friends at Brookland, but he moved to Aberdeen, he’s kinda clued into the whole spy thing though.” Alex tells Eagle, not saying who AJ is, because Eagle might just think he’s a few eggs short of a nest.

Eagle nods, content- and takes out his phone.

“I’ll text the guys and tell ‘em to ignore the mess downstairs.” He states before disappearing into the room across the hall he’d claimed as his own.

Alex shuts the office door and returns to his abandoned chair.

“AJ will be fine later; it was actually Al who was out for most of that- luckily, though he was much shakier than usual.” Alex says, after a few minutes of silence.

Tom nods.

“That’s good, well not good, but you know.” Tom flounders.

“Yeah there’s not a lot we can do, not a lot I can do about AJ right now.” Alex sighs-

“He probably won’t be out for a while though, that’s for sure.” Alex continues.

“Though I’m not too sure about Al either, he might not be around- it’s going to be just me for the most part, which I can’t say I’m too glad about.” He finishes his rambling.

“Just tell me if you switch alright.” Tom says politely.

“Thanks Tom.” Alex responds with a genuine smile.


	6. Chapter 6

Eagle isn’t surprised that Alex has PTSD, after recalling what had happened earlier that day to the rest of K-unit. Though he leaves out Tom, and the conversation he’d overheard, because it wasn’t his place to tell.

Eagle’s never really had to deal with active shooters so close to him before, the man with the gun had been less than five meters away when he’d jumped behind the couch- but Alex was having no problem, joking on the brink of catastrophe, though what scared Eagle more was the explanation given- Alex had a _fucking_ bounty on his head, which really made Eagle think of who might be coming.

“We’re not leaving, not even after this parents evening crap is over. Alex can handle one man with a gun sure- but more than one and he’s fucked.” Wolf concludes the thoughts they’d all had.

It was about six o’clock when it happened, it was now nine and Alex had shown no sign of coming down, not for trail mix or coffee- Fox looks between his unit mates, and sighs.

“I’m going to make sure Alex is alright, well as alright as he can be.” He says quietly before standing up and heading for the flight of stairs, ascending them quickly and disappearing into the office.

Alex is surprisingly unbothered by the whole situation, or at least that’s how he’s acting-

“It’s fine Ben, I’ve had worse-” Alex cut off, realising he’s already said too much and Ben glares at him.

“What do you mean, worse?” Ben responds, ready to walk right into Mrs Jones office and slap her round the face- no matter the consequences.

Alex bristles at the question and doesn’t respond, and Fox can tell this line of questioning has been cut off completely in Alex’s mind. And he faulters for another word to say-

“Really I’m fine Ia- Ben.” Alex says, almost calling Ben Ian, because they’re too similar- and his mind happily provides it means that Ben will soon be dead because of Alex, and he shudders at the thought.

Fox doesn’t believe a single word, but pushing Alex now isn’t going to help, so he nods and shuts the door- Alex goes back to looking at his phone, where he looks down at his lock screen and tries not to tear up seeing the last photo he and Jack had ever taken together, it was on the plane to Cairo and Alex is near tears just thinking about the entire situation.

His breathing hitches in his throat and he swallows a lump, trying desperately not to think about her, or the gunman, or the torture, oh god the torture- He’s outright crying now, and behind the closed office door, Fox still stands listening to the muffled sobs, wishing he could do more.

He heads back downstairs not long after.

“He’s crying.” Fox states flatly, entering the living room.

“But I don’t know if it’s about that gunman, because he didn’t seem worried about that- but he did call me Ian, which was weird.” He continues, his head tilting slightly-

Snake looks up from the book he was leafing through, and towards Fox.

“That’s not a good sign- there’s a chance us being here has done something.” He says,

“What’s something?” Fox responds, getting more concerned by the minute.

“It’s just, he might think we’re other people is all.” Snake tries to explain, and Fox sighs heavily, before dropping onto the couch with all the grace of a sack of spuds and goes back to looking at his phone.

Alex comes down about 30 minutes later, there’s no sign of the tears- but then again there’s no sign of anything behind the cold eyes on display- something about that stare scares Fox more than anything he’s seen on the field, Alex is looking right at him, but it feels like his gaze goes right through him before he passes and wonders into the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

Fox can tell the others are freaked out too, and he can’t blame them, the way the kid acts sometimes is downright haunted. Alex disappears not long after and Wolf exhales a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“What the fuck was that?” He says, which startles Fox back to attention, lost in his musing for a minute.

“That was super freaky, worse than the no footsteps thing.” Eagle agrees-

“It felt like he was looking right through me.” Snake responds and Fox nods his head-

“Same here.” He adds, eyes trailing up the stairs where Alex had been minutes ago.

It may as well have been an empty house, and Alex acted ghostly enough for Fox to briefly entertain the idea of their temporary charge being a spectre, but it was ridiculous thought which he dispelled quickly.

But there must’ve been something more going on- something more than they’d already uncovered, but Fox just can’t figure out what. Alex was an MI6 agent, longer than Ben has been, he’s sure- he’d seen and done things that most adults hadn’t done, he’s said he’s had worse than an active shooter less than a meter away from him- worse than said active shooter aiming a gun at him.

And that simple thing, that single statement has Fox more scared than anything- the government he works for, he is distrustful of- Alex has been put into the line of duty, of fire over and over again- with no regard for him, expecting him to bounce back with no strings attached- it pissed him off beyond belief.

He’s convinced this entire experience is going to give him grey hairs, and he’s only twenty-five dammit- and he doesn’t want to end up dying his hair, because well, that would be a nightmare.

But he’s half thinking about it now, having to sit on his bathroom floor for half an hour, waiting for the dye to develop, all because some dumb teenager who pissed off _a lot_ of people- made him go grey, and hell it was a stupid thought. It almost made him laugh, but then again, if he wasn’t laughing, he may as well be crying over the entire situation, so he supposes it could always be worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also that entire thing about Alex being a ghost, well I actually have a fic with that exact, and I mean exact plot, but like it had one chapter in 2018 and I don't even know how I'd update it lol


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long, I had so much time to write whilst I was self isolating, but since I'm a key worker i haven't had much time ;-;

Alex doesn’t get up on Wednesday, it gets to half past seven and there’s no coffee in the pot, no noise upstairs-

It’s been two years since Ian died, two years since MI6 started using him, and Alex was in no shape to move- he’s huddled on the couch in the office, half asleep and under blankets, cold tears dripping down his face. He doesn’t want to get out and face the world today, and so, he lies alone- there’s a curt knock on the door Alex hears- but he doesn’t respond, and whichever member of K-unit is out there doesn’t intrude.

He doesn’t want anyone to see him like this anyway- it’s a brutal reality of the life he didn’t want to live, alone and depressed, at age sixteen, thinking about all of the blood he’d spilled. It’s a morbid train of thought, which normally leads to vomiting, but he hadn’t eaten in about twenty-four hours anyway- so not much, if anything was going to come up- and Alex knew that.

He can almost see it now, a mountain of corpses right there, in the centre of the office, starting with his parents, and ending with Jack, tens of people between. He can’t wrap his head around why people don’t leave him, he’s a plague, a curse- a devil.

He clenches his fists, balling them up so hard that nails brake skin, and there’s little crescent shaped cuts in his palm- he can see the light shining through the office’s closed blinds and he rolls over to face the back of the sofa.

Fox knocks on the door again- it’s eleven o’clock and Alex hasn’t come down, and he can’t help but worry. There’s still no answer, and Fox is almost convinced that someone had kidnapped Alex during the night. There’s not even the sound of breathing behind the heavy oakwood door of the office.

He returns downstairs regardless, reporting the absence of noise still, it’s Wolf who checks next at twelve- and the hourly rounds of knocking to no avail are beginning to annoy him, since eight they’ve been going up, knocking and then leaving five minutes later. So, he continues forward, knocking the door and waiting, after three minutes of silence he opens the door.

The light from the hallway floods the dark office, falling on the golden hair showing from under a pile of blankets on the sofa, he can barely hear the light sobbing which is muffled by the fabric and he regrets opening the door.

He turns on his heel and leaves shutting the door again as he goes, and heads back down the stairs-

“He’s still there.” Wolf states to the living room, Fox looks up from the patch of floor he’d been staring at.

Wolf doesn’t elaborate on what he’d seen, it was something he didn’t want to repeat-

“I just wouldn’t bother him again until tomorrow morning then, now that we know he’s there.” Snake explains and Wolf nods. Whatever is up with him can’t be good and he doesn’t want to think about it.

* * *

Ben wakes up at three am to the sound of running water coming from the bathroom on the first floor and he thinks he hears music too, distant rock music that sounds like something he would’ve liked ten years ago. A pipe somewhere below him squeaks and the water cuts off, the music continues and he just about recalls its title, _Break out! Break out!_ The silent melody of _I miss you_ comes on not long after and Fox can hear what he figures is Alex humming along.

Ben thought about complaining the next morning, because who the hell listened to music in the shower in the middle of the night? Especially when there were other people in the house, but then that’s the strange part for Alex, he’s normally here alone so he has free reign to listen to music that loud at three.

The music trails away down the hall and behind a shut door, Ben rolls over and goes back to sleep.

* * *

Ben doesn’t see Alex the next morning, but Snake says he left at eight with his headphones in, it’s Thursday now, which means they all need to get their act together, manage to work out as his family, there’s a pile of paper on the table which Wolf says that Alex had left there that morning.

Paragraphs explaining teachers’ names, subjects, time of meeting for the evening, and a description of what Alex thought of them. Most of it was standard to what Ben remembered from his school days, but Alex had said most of his teachers hated him because of the frequent absent mark, he also had a copy of a fake medical record in the pile he’d left- so if a teacher asked about any specific month Alex disappeared they could at least lie coherently.

They spend the morning talking about who’s going, which was ultimately Alex’s choice, Alex had also left in the notes that the school knew he lived with a guardian, so nobody had to lie about names or anything, which they all agreed would make it easier.

Alex came home at three as usual, and entered the living room, looking more cheerful than he had the entire time K-unit had been there, he shrugged off his blazer and chucked it over the edge of the banister.

“Have you decided which one of you is coming tonight?” He asked, walking towards the kitchen.

“Me and Connor decided it’d be best if we did.” Ben answered, and Alex nodded before ducking to grab a loaf of bread from the cupboard beneath the counter.

“The first meeting is in two hours, but they expect you to be early.” Alex explained, whilst struggling to open the bread bag.

“How early?” Connor asked- “I still need to get changed.” He continued.

“Only about fifteen minutes early, do any of you drive?” Alex responded, finally wrestling the bread bag open and putting two slices in the toaster and pushing the lever down.

Ben nodded, and then paused.

“But my cars at home, so we’ll have probably have to walk.” He sighed.

Alex laughed at the complaint in Ben’s tone and the four turned to look at him, shocked.

“What- I do have the ability to laugh, you know?” Alex said with a grin.

Ben chooses to ignore the flash of panic he spots in Alex’s eyes when the toast pops up behind him.

He grabs the toast and takes a bite immediately, Connor see’s the regret in his eyes as he swallows the piece.

“Ow! Hot!” he squeaks in surprise.

Connor laughs and slaps his hand against his forehead and Ben can see Wolf stifling a chuckle.

He puts the toast down.

“Uh, I’d say we should leave at quarter past four- ish. That gives us enough time to get to Brookland.” Alex changes the topic back quickly. Trying to ignore Snake’s amusement at the toast.

He finishes the now cooler toast and heads towards the stairs.

“I’m going to get changed, I suggest you two do the same.” He states before disappearing up the stairs and into his bedroom.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like, I've had about 70% of this chapter done on my laptop for about, uh three months, but I keep being creatively cock blocked by a nine to five job.

Alex comes back down ten minutes later, wearing jeans that had frayed around the knee, a black t-shirt which read fall out boy in yellow text, and black vans.

Ben looked the ensemble up and down and Alex stared back at him, he really didn’t expect Fox to own a leather Jacket. Connor came down five minutes later, wearing something similar to things he’d been wearing all week.

Alex shifts his phone from hand to hand before looking down at the time.

“We should probably go now, it takes about thirty minutes-ish to get to Brookland, you guys know your info, right?” He asked and the two of them nodded.

Alex headed towards the front door, pulling a set of house keys from his pocket and waving for the two of them to follow him, he shoved the key in the lock and jostled it slightly until it unlocked. He pushed the door open and once again motioned for Connor and Ben to follow him.

Once outside Alex did his best to ignore them following him, and just headed to school as usual, well as usual it was to go back to school at five at night to talk to people you hated. He can hear Connor and Ben behind him, talking about how this was going to go, they sounded rather optimistic considering how Alex felt about the whole thing, Mr Rales especially would probably drag Alex for the allotted ten minutes and then complain the Ben and Connor even had the misfortune of knowing him.

He brushes that little ditty to the back of his mind before it gets carried away and before they know it, he’s ushering them through the gates at Brookland and towards the poor kid who’s been put on book in duty.

Said kid glares at him with distain, because everyone seems to hate Alex for no reason in his opinion thank you very much. The glare turns into wide-eyed staring when he sees Eagle and Fox, so as quickly as possible he haphazardly crosses out Alex’s name and points his thumb up the stairs. Alex nods and continues before Fox and Eagle have time to beat up a year nine who got the wrong end of the stick.

Most of the night passes as expected, light roastings from teachers who he barely sees and slight confusion because “It was really nice meeting you, Mr and Mr… Rider?” Which seemed to have both Connor and Ben flustered and stuttering “O’Sullivan” and “Daniels” respectively, which had Alex biting back laughter.

So, everything was going fine- until Mr Rales calls his name, and suddenly he remembers what he was so scared of. Alex seems a lot more hostile by the time they reach the plastic chairs in front of the biology teacher.

Mr Rales wastes no time before turning his full attention onto Fox and Eagle. Complaining about low attendance and using his phone in class, and to their credit Connor and Ben are both good actors, pretending they’re shocked and disappointed, and Alex thinks for a minute that maybe they really are, and the anxiety sets in ten-fold.

Whatever rational part of Alex was left tried to explain that it was a farce, but the part of his head that had long since taken over was exclaiming that they’d leave him too, Eagle asked him a question which he didn’t hear, and Fox decides that it’s probably time to leave- and stands up and pulls Alex away with no explanation.

When they’re outside Eagle tries again.

“Hey Cub, are you alright?” he asks gently again, with no response or even recognition that words were spoken, Fox shakes his head and motions toward the gate- the sooner they get Alex home they- probably Snake, can better figure out what’s going on. Eagle has to hold Alex’s hand to get him to follow, which he does so with no argument.

The sun was setting quickly as Fox weaved through the park Alex had led them through about an hour earlier. The sun had just about gone when they got back to the house, it looked tall and intimidating in the dim light, and Fox knocks on the door heavily, because Alex had left the keys in the door before they’d headed out.

Snake opens the door and looks at Fox’s frantic look, Eagle’s worried face and Alex’s glazed eyes. He asks what happened, but Fox and Eagle really don’t know, he was fine one minute and the next he was pale and not responding. They sit him down on the sofa and wait, seeing if he’ll come back round. After around twenty minutes of nervous pacing Alex’s eyes seem to focus on Connor’s pacing form. His train of thought kicks back in and tries to piece together what happened- school? Home? K-unit?

“Wha-” is all he can manage before four sets of concerned eyes are on him.

“Alex have you ever had flashbacks before?” Snake pounces immediately.

“Okay- slow down, I don’t even know what happened over the last like three, uh hours? Days? Weeks even? Did we go to parents evening?” Alex garbles out. Wolf nods.

“It’s been about two hours since you left for parents evening- about twenty-five minutes since you’ve been home, but you were unresponsive.” Wolf explains.

“I honestly, have no idea what happened.” Alex confirmed. “I remember leaving the house, with Eagle and Fox, that’s it.”

The four don’t seem any less worried with those words and Alex wants them to go back to pacing and not looking at him.

Ewan looks at him seriously, and Alex tries a cheap smile.

“The repression’s a bitch, ya know?” He half jokes and Ewan looks about ready to bite his head off.

“No, I don’t know Alex- care to explain why a bloody sixteen-year-old boy is joking about repressing memories?” He seethes. Alex sours at that- and Ben steps in before Snake can do any damage to Alex or his surroundings.

“You wouldn’t understand, besides the deal was three days. Get out of my house.” Alex ends quietly and disappears upstairs as if there wasn’t still four SAS men in his living room.

The four of them look at each other, Alex had been fine alone for so long, and yet he seemed so close to death at all times, it was kind of scary. They understood Alex wanted them out, but they couldn’t oblige. They would protect him, no matter how much he acted like he didn’t need it.


End file.
